


feelings are fatal

by kailogan



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst, Blowjobs, Bottom Chanyeol, Friends With Benefits, Hidden Feelings, M/M, Sweet as a Strawberry, Unrequited Love, angsty smut, basically chanyeol being sad and sucking dick, fire imagery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-07
Updated: 2019-01-07
Packaged: 2019-10-06 08:06:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,431
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17341697
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kailogan/pseuds/kailogan
Summary: Chanyeol really needs to stop doing this.Baekhyun is just so tempting.





	feelings are fatal

**Author's Note:**

> "i’m always sad   
> and i’m always lonely   
> but i can’t tell you   
> that i’m breaking slowly"  
>  \- feelings are fatal by mxmtoon

Chanyeol really needs to stop doing this.    
  
Baekhyun is just so tempting.    
  
When he saunters up to him, lip between his teeth and eyes darkened, the battle is already lost. Even when Chanyeol promises himself,  _ it’s the last time _ , it never is. He’s too easy to push, to bend for Baekhyun, too eager to please him.   
  
"You're so good, Yeol, so good" Baekhyun all but purrs, stroking his hair as he thrusts gently into his mouth. He’s soft today, all brief touches and steady pressure. It’s balanced, gradual. Chanyeol prefers it when it’s rushed, hard enough to make him forget the warmth that Baekhyun’s sweetness summons up in his gut. Although, Chanyeol is glad for the lack of bruises this encounter will leave him stained with.    
  
Chanyeol is glad his mouth is full enough to muffle the whimper that builds in his throat.    
  
"I love you like this, so pretty," Baekhyun continues to praise and Chanyeol's glad he has an excuse for tears welling in his eyes. He’s always known he looks good, but it feels different coming from Baekhyun. 

It feels like fire.    
  
His heart is burning up, splintering like burnt firewood. The fragments breaking apart and embedding themselves in his other organs, the ash clogging his arteries. He's so breathless, as if his lungs have been punctured, the insides scorched with thick, acrid smoke.    
  
"Come here, Yeollie," Baekhyun says, pulling him up mostly by the hand gripping his hair.    
  
It hurts and Chanyeol hates it, hates that he loves it. He hates that he loves Baekhyun’s fingers and his eyes and the way his voice sounds when he cums. Hates it with all the strength he can muster.   
  
"Fuugh-" He lets out a strangled sound, half curse and half groan when Baekhyun takes his cock in hand. His palm is soft, unmarked by the callouses that mark Chanyeol’s own.    
  
As always, he's efficient and smooth, practised. Chanyeol hates that it makes him think of all the other people Baekhyun has touched like this, has let touch him the way he lets Chanyeol touch him.   
  
"Can I fuck you today?" Baekhyun asks, smirking when Chanyeol's legs buckle at the combination of the words and the sensation of Baekhyun's hand on him. “So good for me, so tight, feels so good when I’m inside you.”   
  
He shudders. Baekhyun is so good at this, so good at making Chanyeol desperate for him. He’s good at wrecking him. 

Chanyeol wants to say yes, wants to beg for it, he wants...   
  
He shakes his head, his stomach dropping at the frown that develops on Baekhyun's lips.    
  
"Ah-cum in my ah! Fuck, want you to cum in my mouth," he manages to say, knowing it'll distract Baekhyun from his worry, his doubt.    
  
Baekhyun is hesitant but his eyes are hungry.    
  
"Please," Chanyeol begs, causing Baekhyun to let him back down to his knees. He bites his lip, teeth making a dent in the pillowy texture. His saliva makes it shine, light reflecting off the fullness of his lower lip, now pink and wet and promising.    
  
"So needy, God, go on then," Baekhyun allows, pressing the head of his cock against Chanyeol's lips again.    
  
He pulls back when Chanyeol opens his mouth, trying to take him in.    
  
Baekhyun's hand moves to his chin, tilting his head up, thumb pressing against Chanyeol's bottom lip. It’s not a caress, no matter how much Chanyeol wants to believe it is.    
  
Chanyeol leans into the touch, let's the weight of his head be held by the elder.    
  
"You want it, yeah? Want to taste my cum, Yeollie?" There's an edge to the question, a pause, like Baekhyun can see something in him, some hint of the emotions twirling in his stomach.    
  
Chanyeol hopes against hope that he can't. As much as it hurts, as it breaks him to hear the nicknames and praises on his friend's lips, he doesn't want to lose it. Not when he knows that other people get to have Baekhyun like this, that Baekhyun won't hesitate to replace him with another pretty, warm mouth. 

No one really likes to feel used, but Chanyeol would rather let Baekhyun use him that see him turn to someone else.   
  
"Please, Baek, want it." He's not lying either, he does want the taste of Baekhyun's cum filling his mouth, the weight of his cock on Chanyeol's tongue.    
  
He just wishes, in a hidden, private place deep inside his bruised heart, that Baekhyun wouldn't say his name when they were like this. he wishes that a pet-name would slip from his lips.  _ Jagi, baby, darling, love. _ He wishes that he could call Baekhyun  _ his _ .    
  
Chanyeol wishes Baekhyun would kiss him, even if it was just once. 

“Mmm, good,” Baekhyun hums, letting Chanyeol take him into his mouth again. He gasps quietly when Chanyeol drags his teeth against the underside of his dick. Chanyeol gets off on it, painfully hard at the sounds that Baekhyun lets drip from his lips.

He swirls his tongue around the head of Baekhyun’s cock, relishing the heavy, full moan that it pulls from him. Chanyeol knows that he’s putting it on, that Baekhyun could get through this whole encounter close to silently if he wanted. The moans and soft curses are all for Chanyeol’s benefit. He appreciates them. 

He sinks down lower, letting Baekhyun fuck his mouth. It’s still not quick like it often is, not deep and hard enough to make him gag. Baekhyun lets his cock drag across Chanyeol’s lips, making the sensation feel full and heavy enough that Chanyeol can feel his mouth buzzing, going numb at the slow pressure of it. 

“Close,” Baekhyun says, eyes fixed on the way Chanyeol’s lips are stretched around him. 

Chanyeol reaches down to touch himself, too swallowed up in the pleasure searing his veins, the heady anticipation of Baekhyun filling him up, cumming in his mouth, owning him. Even if it’s just a fantasy, a temporary comfort, Chanyeol’s utterly addicted to being wrapped up in Baekhyun, Baekhyun, Baekhyun…

When he comes, it’s with Chanyeol’s name on his lips. 

That alone brings Chanyeol to the brink, his own cum coating his hand as Baekhyun fills his mouth. 

He swallows around him, half-sobbing at the overstimulating nature of it, of Baekhyun’s taste covering his tongue. Chanyeol sucks him until Baekhyun is pushing him off, mouth twisting with sensitivity. 

He steps back and begins buckling his belt, straightening his clothes, neatening his hair. 

Chanyeol feels...empty. His body aches to be held. He wants to be kissed. He fixes his gaze on the floor, to keep Baekhyun from seeing the broken expression he can feel his face making. 

“You okay?” Baekhyun asks. 

When Chanyeol looks up he sees Baekhyun holding out a hand for him to take, to help pull him up. There’s a smile lighting his face, bright and stunning. It dazzles Chanyeol, makes it  _ worth it _ .

Chanyeol doesn’t trust his voice, so he just nods, taking Baekhyun’s outstretched hand. Satisfaction fills him at the disgusted look on Baekhyun’s face when he feels the wet and sticky liquid still covering Chanyeol’s fingers. 

“Urgh, what the fuck,” he complains, pulling his hand back as soon as Chanyeol is on his feet. 

Chanyeol just laughs, pushing the empty feeling deep down into himself, locking it away tightly. The fire in his chest has burnt out, leaving only ashy stains on his ribcage and the lingering scent of charcoal. 

Baekhyun mutters something about betrayal as he moves to get a tissue. He still brings some for Chanyeol regardless.

They were planning to order food but Baekhyun says he’s too hungry to wait, so instead they sit at the kitchen table, eating fruit. Chanyeol peels tangerines whilst Baekhyun slices some watermelon and gets a carton of strawberries from the fridge. 

When Baekhyun bites down on the small fruit, a drop of red juice traces its way down to his chin. Chanyeol swallows his mouthful of watermelon and resolutely doesn’t think about wiping it away.   
  
He doesn’t think about licking Baekhyun’s lips clean, about pressing the taste of citrus into the sweetness of his mouth. 

He doesn’t think about kissing Baekhyun.

He doesn’t think about Baekhyun kissing him back.

Chanyeol really needs to stop doing this, but Baekhyun really is just so tempting. 

(And he tastes sweet enough the cover up the bitter aftermath of the blaze he burned in Chanyeol’s chest, to smother the blistering heat threatening to consume him from the inside out, to salve his wounds and resow the places Chanyeol has unravelled, he tastes oh, so sweet...like strawberries.) 

**Author's Note:**

> i'm sorry for this, really, i am.


End file.
